|
 I
begin to doubt the truth of love
when
it produces happiness
as
much as I doubted the truth of love
when
it produced sadness.
I
fought for both of these loves
at
different times
because
at different times
I
believed them to be true.
Only
now I know one of them to be a lie
and
the other to be true
but
the one I know to be true causes more pain
than
the one I know to have been a lie.
I
run to the one that I know to have been a lie
because
I am conditioned to tolerate the pain.
The
pain from the one I know to be true is far greater
than
the pain from the one I know to be a lie.
Yet
if I could only stand still long enough
to
examine the two loves
I
would find not pain
but
myself.
Robert
J. Allison
May
18, 1995
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